The alarm sounds, toddler whizzes past the bathroom and straight for the couch....distant warnings in the background "watch out for the.." and its too late the floor won this fight 1-0. As the mother comes out and picks up her darling daughter off the floor she sighs and wonders how long it will take for the coffee to brew....
The transition from baby to toddler is certainly an interesting one to say the least. I didn't count on it being so exciting when I decided, or more or less was thrown into a huge life change including a new job, a move and then another move. I can't fathom that July was the last time I even sat down to my writing. It's true what they say about time flying by faster and faster as we get older. Its even worse when you have a kid! I feel like the days are slipping away so quickly and wondering how this happens. My beautiful daughter has grown so amazingly over the past few months into a rambunctious, very independent, extremely verbal and dramatic toddler. Just when I thought I was getting a handle on this single mom game the tables turned!
In truth its actually quite wonderful even with the ups and downs, so here's a quick peek into what all has happened over the past few months. In November Mia and I finally were able to move into our own place! Just a little taste of the difference between Roanoke and Northern Va. We went from a huge 2 bedroom basement apartment for $650 a month to a 818 square feet one bed condo for $1150. Yes you read right, talk about a price change. Fortunately we have managed to make it work.
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| Mia's Dresser |
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| My Bed |
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| Mia's Bed |
As you can see the bedroom is split so Mia and I both have our own side. Although, it is not up yet I plan to also hang a curtain from the ceiling that will act as a divider which will be somewhat sheer so it still gives me an idea into what she is doing when shes being quiet and mischievous. The dinning room, living room and kitchen are coming along quite nicely too, however, I would like to be more organized than I am currently. Just one of my many 2015 new years resolutions. Life in the city has definitely been different with both good and bad parts. I am back in Alexandria in close proximity to Old Town which is a dear love of mine. I am fortunate to be able to share all of this with Mia. Old Town Alexandria is home to the
Torpedo Factory Art Center which is a great place to stroll and often their are musicians hanging around front playing and bringing life to the streets. This is our go to on the weekends now.
The next place I am planning to check out is a place in Fairfax called
PB and Jack , which apparently has yoga classes on the weekend, which I would love to get into if I can afford it. We are fortunate to be in an area with so many museums, activities and opportunities which does excite me. However, one realization I have come to in returning home is that I have limited to no connection with my old social groups. You always hear how things change when you become a parent but I never expected my friends to be that way. Since I have been home I have only seen my old friends twice. I am learning not to take it to heart when I see them out doing things but unwilling to interact with me and Mia.
There seems to be some disconnect between those who have kids and those who don't, silly to me but quite true. Just the other day, an old friend went downtown to walk around and do brunch, when I inquired why she didn't call me she said "you have a kid". Well, brace yourself moms, apparently "kids" don't walk and definitely can't do brunch. Excuse my snickers, but, are you serious? Yes, she was very serious. So I dearly miss the meetups, the close group of parents I had in
Roanoke and the connections I had made. Fortunately, I have maintained
those contacts and it has encouraged me to look for more up here. I have
joined a few meetups and will be sure to post how they turn out.
On the sperm donor front, moving home has made little to no change. I drove to see Mia's father once since we have been home and it ended in me buying dinner for him and the children and a request for money for laundry. Mia's paternal grandmother and other family members have been exactly the same, no contact, no response. I am coming to terms, although slowly, with the very realistic truth that Mia will not have her father in her life. I feel like this is something that will always pull on my heart strings and sometimes I wonder whether I have to strength to manage, but I know in the end this is better. She is thriving, talking so much and one of the happiest toddlers I have ever seen and there is no way I will put her at risk to be pulled into a negative relationship with an alcoholic who refuses to grow up. I am realizing that I cannot change him no matter how hard I try or what field I am in. I can however, protect my daughter and give her everything she needs. She does not need to know the negative things about her father or even why he's not around, right now she just needs to be loved and supported and that is what she will get.
The job with
Pathway Homes, Inc. that I took when I moved has been beyond amazing for us. It has really enlightened me into the world of homelessness, which was not one of my expertise. The new challenges and benefits of an upper level management position have really taught me a great deal and given me an amazing opportunity to share my knowledge with a younger generation in the field of Mental Health.
Its been a lot of changes, too many to really post here but as you can see, we seem to be doing alright. I will be writing more and focusing on freelance as I continue to get settled and organized here in the city. Happy 2015, its going to be great!
